FILLIO EMPIRE HEADQUARTERS RELOCATES

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

HOLLY SPRINGS, NC, February 29, 2008 -- After nearly eight years inside the Beltway, the Fillio Family has migrated south.

“We’d been thinking about this business decision for several years now,” noted CEO and husband Chris, “and the right opportunity finally came along. The timing, the job offer, the recession…it just seemed to make sense.”

Citing a longtime desire to leave behind the brutal winters of Northern Virginia, co-CEO and wife Val echoed the earlier sentiments.

“I just got fed up eventually with the weather. All the snow shoveling, chipping ice off the front steps, scraping the car window in the morning. After awhile you get tired of continually having to ask your husband to do all those things. Criminy…time to move on.”

The Fillio children were as emphatic though not as verbose in their consent.

“I want a super dinosaur monster truck and peanut butter chocolate Oreos and big hundred million Speed Racer cars!” screamed Alex.

“Baaazlblaagh,” noted Zoe in complete agreement with her elder sibling.

At a recent press conference in their new hometown, Chris was grilled about widespread rumors throughout the liberal media that this latest strategic decision was politically motivated.

“Look, we’d had enough of George Bush’s failed policies. We simply weren’t going to stay around if he was coming back for another four years. As Dick Van Patten used to say, eight is enough!”

When informed that term limits precluded such a third term, Chris threw his shoe at the reporter and ran out of the press room yelling, “The North shall rise again!!!”

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VAL FILLIO SPAWNS SECOND, FINAL PROGENY

In the early evening of Thursday, September 20th, the Fillio family welcomed the newest addition to their nuclear family: Zoe Alexandria Fillio.

The final deliverable was presented at Sibley Memorial Hospital in Washington, D.C., with a small audience of medical professionals in attendance. Also at the scene was new father (again) and reigning WWFFL Champion, Chris.

The tale of the tape lists Zoe at 6lbs, 11oz. and 19in, time-stamped at 20:46. Dr. Russell Bridges OB-GYN performed the delivery.

"I’m pretty satisfied with the way this project concluded," said new mom (again), Val Fillio. "We had a few speedbumps and challenges along the way but everyone pitched in and got the job done."

For his part, new father Chris was able to stomach several helpings of barely palatable hospital food.

"This was certainly a team effort, though most of my work was finished during the initial requirements phase several months ago," stated an excited Chris. "I really have to give all the credit to Val. She did most of the heavy lifting and endured numerous sacrifices to pull off this project successfully. She’s a real trooper."

When pressed for details about possible future family expansion, both primary parties had no comment.

FILLIO WINS FANTASY FOOTBALL CHAMPIONSHIP

Domination.

In a word, that was this year’s WWFFL champion, Spankcircus, led by the most dominating player in the NFL this year, running back LaDainian Tomlinson. Thoroughly outclassing the opposition all year Spankcircus (14-2, 2-0) easily dispatched The Dilberts, 60-49 in the 10th annual WWFFL Superbowl.

“With the kind of year that LT had, it was certainly a plus for our team offensively,” noted team owner and general manager, Chris Fillio. “But still, we had a number of other guys step up and have big years. D-Nabb (Donovan McNabb) was on his way to another Pro Bowl season when we lost him in week 11, but then Jeff (Garcia) filled in nicely the rest of the way. It seemed like week-in, week-out, another of our skill players was taking their game to the next level. Just a great team effort all around.”

Fillio also highlighted the performances of rookie RB Reggie Bush, veteran WR Javon Walker, and kickers Nate Kaeding and Robbie Gould.

“Any time you have not only one but the two best placekickers in the game, that’s saying something,” noted Fillio. “Those guys were money.”

The extent of Spankcircus’ domination was clear in the numbers:
- Won WWFFL championship 60-49;
- Regular season total points champion;
- Regular season top power-rank;
- Regular season top game score (week 9, 72pts);
- Regular season weekly high score four times; and
- Average score of all games was 52-38.

“Certainly, we’re very pleased with the results this year,” said Fillio. “But we’re not done yet. It all starts in the off-season with our draft preparation. We enjoy the present success…but we will never rest as long as there’s still work to be done.”

FILLIO DEFEATS CITY HALL

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Alexandria, VA, October 12, 2006 -- In a landmark legal decision yesterday, Chris Fillio defeated the City of Alexandria’s Real Estate Assessment Board at a hearing to dispute the Fillio’s 2006 Property Assessment.

“This is a great day for landowners everywhere, but especially for those of us suffering under the oppressive regime of The City,” heralded Fillio when reached for comment shortly after the hearing. “We are sending a message to government officials everywhere that they are hereby on notice to be accountable for their actions. No longer shall the common man be held victim to the whims and fancies of the money lords at City Hall.”

Having been unsuccessful in similar appeals each of the past four years, Fillio felt confident that the fifth time would be the charm.

“In past years, I’d prepare lengthy and detailed discourses to present to the Board in arguing our case”, noted Fillio. “But this year, I had the date wrong on my calendar and had roughly thirty minutes to prepare, including the optional shower and shave.”

Fillio later confessed that the compressed preparation timeframe forced him to focus on the facts and allowed him to stay the course in arguing his defense.

“It was really quite simple,” he offered. “The market has been softening. I know it, they know it…hell, the whole goddamn world knows it. The dirty little secret of property assessments is that these government cash whores will suck the last penny out of your funeral garb because they realize most people won’t bother to fight it.”

In a decision which may ripple across the national realty landscape, Fillio successfully argue to receive an adjustment of 2.2%, from $616,200 to $601,900. The net gain on the tax bill for the year will be $116.55.

When asked what he would do about the windfall, Fillio was predictably humble.

“I honestly don’t think our lives will change much with these new-found riches. We’ll still be the same folks we’ve always been.”

Rumors that the Fillios were seen later that week shopping for a new clock radio at a local Alexandria appliance store could not be substantiated.

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CHRIS FILLIO COMPLETES 5TH AND FINAL MARATHON

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Arlington, VA, October 30, 2005 -- Vowing that a good showing would make this his final marathon, Chris Fillio kept true to his word, retiring after a personal best 02:57:33 in the 30th running of the Marine Corps Marathon. The race was Fillio's fifth attempt to break the three-hour barrier, having run previously in 2000-2003.

With near ideal weather conditions and almost five months of intense training behind him, Fillio easily surpassed his previous PR of 03:16:51, set in 2002.

More importantly, through his work soliciting donations from numerous, generous friends, Fillio was able to raise almost $3000 for the Big Brothers Big Sisters of the National Capial Area.

"I really felt pretty good out there, though admittedly there were some times where coming in under three [hours] was in doubt," noted Fillio. "I give a lot of credit to my focused training and all the support I received. My wife, my training partner, Alex...they were great. And I got tons of excellent advice from my running coach, Nick Panebianco. He's the man!"

While some have speculated that Fillio would come out of retirement to compete in addditional marathons, he all but put those rumors to bed.

"This is it for me, marathon-wise," said an obviously elated Fillio. "I had a lifelong goal of breaking three hours and I did it. It's time to move on. Besides, the time investment...what, five months hard training and an offseason regimen? That takes up ten, twenty hours a week. That's time I could better spend with my family, or even drinking beer."

Later, Fillio noted that he will continue competitive running, and has set a new goal of a sub 1-hour 10-miler. In his only 10-mile race to date, the 2004 Army Ten Miler, Fillio came in at 1:06.

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VAL FILLIO TAKES 2ND OVERALL IN ACTA SPRING CHARITY TOURNEY

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Arlington, VA, April 24, 2005 -- Val Fillio took over a year off to train for her most recent tournament.

It took her less than two days and only three matches to prove to the competition that she's back in top form...with a vengeance.

Showing the finesse and technique that earned her WOTY honors in 2004, Fillio easily dispatched Beth Wilt to open play in the ACTA Women's Singles 3.5 Bracket, and then outdueled Jenny Henman in two sets with a tiebreaker (10-8) in the semifinals. In the finals, Fillio started slowly but finished strong, though it was not enough to overcome eventual champion Tonya Scott.

"Obviously there was some concern with meeting Jenny in the second round, since no doubt Saturday evening she was receiving ample advice from her cousin (#19 ATP ranked) Tim Henman," said Val. "It was indeed a battle of wills."

Fillio endured the ever-changing elements and a grueling schedule which included five matches in the span of less than 30 hours.

"I knew there might be some butterflies when she first came back from the time off," said proud husband and personal trainer, Chris, "But I also knew that once her soles hit those courts, her instincts would kick in."

Assistant coach and son, Alex Fillio, echoed the sentiments.

"Na na na na. Goo. Blah goo goo."

Team Fillio would not indicate where Val might next surface in competition, though all indications point towards a run at Wimbeldon.

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ALEX FILLIO TAKES 2ND OVERALL IN 3RD ANNUAL WMZQ DIAPER DERBY

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Fair Oaks, VA, February 12, 2005 -- Alex Fillio took over a year off to train for his most recent race.

It took him less than thirty seconds to prove to the crawling competition that he's back...with a vengeance.

Showing the speed and technique that earned him MVB honors in 2004, Fillio blitzed the field in his first competitive heat at the 3rd Annual WMZQ Diaper Derby. In the finals, Fillio started slowly but finished strong to take second place overall, besting more than 100 other crawlers [Complete photos].

"I knew there might be some butterflies when he first came back from the time off," said proud father and personal trainer, Chris, "But I also knew that once the starting gun sounded, his instincts would kick in."

Assistant coach and mother, Val Fillio, echoed the sentiments.

"He's definitely a world-class crawler, that much we knew. Still we were concerned about the late morning start and a possible scheduling conflict with naptime. He's a real trooper, though. Obviously he was a bit winded going into the finals but he put forth a huge effort. Huge...just huge."

Team Fillio would not indicate where Alex might next surface in competition, though all indications point towards a run at the gold medal in Beijing in 2008.

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