The Legend of Gary Lane

Baseball tryouts at Exeter Area High School would inevitably begin each year in the high school gym, usually due to the presence of significant snowfall still on the ground. Most seasons were initiated by a pep talk or lecture from varsity coach Bill Taylor, a true legend in his own right. Coach Taylor was a physical education teacher at the adjacent junior high, as well as the varsity football and basketball coach at the high school. In short, Bill Taylor was high school sports at Exeter.

The opening lecture each year, while slightly varied in content, would reliably migrate to the topic of several taboo items for would-be members of the baseball team: no smoking—or “butts”, as Coach Taylor called them; no drinking; no weed (“funny butts”, per Coach Taylor); and no swearing, especially no F-bombs. The first three offenses were typically handled under normal disciplinary means meted out by high school policy regarding students and athletes. The final category of offenses was a punishment known by only two words: Gary Lane.

Gary Lane was a short, nondescript street running East-West between Linden and Court Streets. With Pine Street flanking the “box” to the North and also running East-West, the four streets formed a short 1.81mi route. During Winter/Spring workouts, this excursion was seemingly innocuous as the entire legion of baseballers would traipse ploddingly around the course circumference at the outset of each practice. But during the season, the exercise was more punitive in nature. Caught using the f-bomb during practice? “Gary Lane!” cried out Coach Taylor. Missed a sign or the cutoff man during drills? “Gary Lane!” screamed Coach Taylor. Late for practice with no apparent pre-determined excuse in hand? Normally even the two magical words were not required. Instead one would hurriedly show up—albeit late, approach Coach Taylor as he carefully surveyed the practice in progress and, upon viewing the icy stare from his eyes, one would simply veer off course and begin the 1.81mi journey.